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IT’S ODD that Fraser Nelson, who has been around the Commons for a long time, should get it so wrong in his latest News of the World column:

When Charlie turns up late for Commons debates (i.e. most days) and can’t find a seat, he usually toddles off to the Labour side.

Either Nelson has resorted to making stuff up, or he’s been woefully misinformed. In nine years in the chamber, I have never, on any single occasion, seen Charlie Kennedy sitting among Labour MPs. And the idea that on any day other than a Wednesday just before PMQs, or Budget day, the chamber is so full you can’t get a seat is laughable.

But the language Nelson deploys to describe Kennedy is sneering and nasty in the extreme: “the only defection being considered is from Glenfiddich to Glenmorangie”, “If he’s going to cross the floor, he needs to be able to do it in a straight line”, “he’s run out of drinking partners. So he ends up getting all maudlin with Labour MPs”.

So that’s how the editor of the most respected right-wing magazine in the country writes about a man whose marriage has only recently come to a very public end, and who led his party to two of its best general election results in its history?

I admit, I wanted to believe the rumours that Charlie was going to join Labour; he’s popular with our lot and it’s no secret that he considers himself closer to us politically than to the Tories. And it would have delt a mightly blow against Clegg and the coalition, so that’s another plus.

But neither was I surprised when he finally (and oddly belatedly) put an end to the rumour mill. Charlie will stick with his party, even if they don’t deserve him. And he doesn’t deserve the kind of smug curled-lip journalism pedalled by the likes of Nelson.

Having said that, the last part of Nelson’s column (yeah, I know) is worth a look:

But the sensible small-government liberals (David Laws, Nick Clegg, Jeremy Browne) could settle down in the Tory Party where they are genuinely admired.

In a few weeks, Clegg must meet his party malcontents at the annual conference. And be asked why the poll rating is a third of where it was three months ago.

Whether it’s splinter or split, some kind of LibDem break-up now looks inevitable. And the Tories will be dearly hoping they can gobble up whatever remains.